When Roseanne finds the alleged pot stash of her daughter’s-live-in-boyfriend-except-her-daughter-moved-out, Chelsea and Andrew have more questions than just “what is this relationship even?” Do we inevitably turn into our parents, or were we never as cool as we remember being? How potented IS 20-year-old toilet pot? Join us for an exploration of all these topics, and a whole lot of Laurie Metcalf fangirling.
What are the Seaver kids up to this week? Why, a good old-fashioned 80s cocaine party! Join Chelsea, Andrew, Miles, Mike, Boner, and Michael Caine (in spirit) as we dive into what to do when you’re at a party and your dad’s much-younger fiancé dangles a vial of blow in your face.
The title of this episode is a bit misleading, because Tootie actually finds FOUR BONGS over the course of 24 minutes. What is going on here? And who will take these wayward children firmly in hand? You can bet it won’t be Mrs. Garrett, so come along with us and Oscar-Winner Helen Hunt to plumb the depths of Eastland School — hotbed of crime.
Here it is: the granddaddy of them all. If you remember only one VSE from the 90s, it’s probably this one. WE’RE SO EXCITED because tonight we’re gonna make it happen — with the help of our Very Special Guest, writer and culture vulture Brian Otaño. Join us for our Season 2 Finale as we…
There’s something happening here — what it is ain’t exactly clear. Because the actors are reading off teleprompters, so there’s no emotional journey to track. Welcome to the baffling world of DRAGNET 67, the (first) reboot of the un-self-aware police procedural that will not quit! Join Andy, Chelsea, and Blue Boy as we learn about the terrifying dangers of LSD (overstated), the Sunset Strip Curfew Riots (fascinating) and actor/writer Jack Webb’s relationship with real LAPD cops (very chummy). Plus, we pitch our idea for a promising further reboot: RuPaul’s Dragnet!
Tim and Jill The Tool Parents Taylor face a conundrum when they catch one of their sons with a bag of pot: is it better to be honest with your kids and hope they learn from your mistakes, or lie to them and treat them as potential felons? That’s an important question, probably worth its own episode of exploration, but we have to devote at least 50% of this episode to wondering about JTT’s current whereabouts, and discussing the irony of Tim Allen’s career. Sorry not sorry.
The Beave is at it again: repeating things verbatim to the wrong people, messing around in the yard with Larry, and befriending creepy drunks he meets on the sidewalk. But he’s not the only one with “troubles” — Wally’s imaginary girlfriend is mad at him, and The Parents Cleaver are locked in a silent, vague battle of wills. There’s a lot going on under the surface of “Leave It To Beaver.” Luckily Andrew and Chelsea are here to dig it all up and scrutinize it mercilessly.
It’s time for DJ and Kimmy to attend their first frat party — at the only frat in the world that kicks you out for drinking beer. Whose remembrance of the evening is correct? Which of the girls was actually beset with hunks, and which ended up on reject row? Alcohol clouds the memory, so we’re here to break it all down for you. How will these BFFs (best friends forever) survive becoming BFFs (bitter fucking foes)? And how on earth could Kimmy have forgotten the entire inciting incident of this show? You’ll have to listen to find out.
It’s All Dudes On Deck when baby sister Joanie Cunningham starts *gasp* smoking cigarettes on HAPPY DAYS. Now that she’s a member of The Magnets, nothing is too grown up for this sixteen-year-old. Join Andrew, Chelsea, and literally every man in Joanie’s life as they try to tempt her back to the side of health in the 1950s, using 1970s logic. It’s a *cough* smoooooth ride.
Are the teens of the 80s legitmately concerned about the state of the world they’re inheriting, or are they being brainwashed into angry zombies by this “silly fad” of punk music? You think you know, but you have no idea, man. Join Chelsea and Andrew as they follow the adventures of a rogue medical examiner and his reactionary girlfriend into a world of outrage, slamdancing, murder, and good old ‘ludes. When they’re around, every room is an emergency room.